That’s it. That was the straw that broke the angel’s blue back! I’m trying to be cool – After all, I AM the King of Spades, but even I have my limits. Last night I took a risk. I decided to sneak out and head of to evil Hoyletown – you know… sin city. Anyway, I thought I’d be able to scope out some new chicas, but you’re not going to believe this. There in Hoyletown was none other than four blue-backed Bicycle chicks, more specifically… the Queens.
That’s right, Hearts, Spades, Clubs, and Diamonds all hanging around talking to one guy. Guess who… the pathetic introverted, woe-is-me strong-sad wanna be King of Hearts. Do you know why the Queens are swarming him? Because he’s suicidal, because he walks around with a Knife in his head. It’s all an act. They think is deep and disturbed like Serious Seinfeld when George told him not to be funny – What?! Just because I’m a playing card, I can’t watch TV?
Anyway, the truth is, it’s all an act. The King of Hearts is actually a totally romantic guy – He is the King of Hearts, but he decided to play the sad and deeply disturbed card, and the Queens are Joker enough to fall for it…. Suckers! This is getting old, I’m not getting any younger here, and I’m starting to split from all the improper faros my amateur master does. Help me find a woman!
Please if you have any ideas where the King of Spades can meet a lovely woman (preferable a Queen), please post a comment to this thread and help a brotha out!
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